Hair Struggles

Let me take the time to adequately set the tone for this sad, sad story (cue violin). Exactly 3 years ago when I graduated from college, I decided it would be a good idea to change up my look. At the time that “look” included straight hair, button ups, khakis, and flats. After much time contemplating what would elevate my look overall, I decided on a haircut. A minor move for most normal adults, but not myself. I had about 2 other “haircuts” in my life and one of those was an accident (I’ll save that story for a later date).

As I began my Google search I asked myself, “Do I want to look like Meagan Good or Kelly Rowland? What haircut would really compliment my round face? Should I try a new color as well?” I had so many questions so I decided to run my idea by my stylist. Her response was something like, I knew this was coming. She knows how I get, she gets me. I go through phases with my hair where I just want to be done with my normal routine. Is there a name for this sickness??

Her suggestion was to start with a weave before I made my final decision so that I could see how I liked my selected style without being locked into my decision. I winded up opting for a simple, sassy, luscious bob that was a sew in (weave). Most people thought I had actually cut my hair (mission accomplished). I too was thrilled, until I took the weave out (cue heavy, deep sigh)…then it was right back to square one.

I couldn’t handle it! When I looked in the mirror I did not like what I saw. The hair on my head was just there. There was no twinkle in my eye, no pep in my step- the hair had to go!

As I again sat in my stylist’s chair, I told my girl, “Let’s do this!” I didn’t know exactly what my new look would be, but I could only hope that it would be better than the last. I took my wonderful “weaved bob” to the next level with my own hair. Yess…I took that major step and chopped inches off. If you’re thinking, Girl bye, people cut their hair everyday. Umm…hol’ up, hol’up. People might be doing that, but not me. Change really isn’t my thing especially when it comes to my appearance. In fact, it was scary to see my own bundles on the floor, but I released my fears and embraced the change.

Sadly, this new do lasted amount a month (if that, I can’t really remember). What I do remember is disliking the way that my hair looked straightened after a few days and when the back started to stick up, I could never figure out a way to lay it back down without curling it. Soo…back to square one, AGAIN. That’s it! Somebody say a prayer for me and this head.

At my next hair appointment I walked in the shop and demanded it all off. “I don’t need it, what’s the point, I’m over it!” Before I knew it, I was in the chair with my fingers crossed and hands clenched. Each time she combed through my hair and snipped her scissors I wanted to peek in the mirror. What did I wind up with??

The cutest mushroom that I had no idea how to maintain on my own, but I had no choice, but to learn.  For months I loved my look. I would wear it wet or dry, curled or straight- I was good either way.

Fast forward to the next year. I thought I hit my head because I realized what I had done. I barely had hair on the back of my neck, a ponytail was impossible, and the in between look was blah. Unfortunately, once the big chop is made there’s no turning back.

My advice, if you are thinking about changing your look, I would encourage you to take the time to really think about your decision so you don’t go back and forth like I did. Especially when you are not such a fan of change. When you get an idea of what you want to change, research and ask a few friends what they think. There’s no real formula for getting it right, but atleast you can do it better than me.
Change is good.

-Jay 😊
P.S. I’ll upload pictures soon.


Update: As promised here are pictures of my transformation! (I could NOT find pictures of my weaved bob.)


Natural bob 2014
Straight Mushroom 2014


Curled Mushroom 2014
Natural Mushroom 2014
Grow-out 2015
Grow-out 2016